Small Limits...

How I been feeling lately sometimes...

I don't normally do vent art...and normally I try not to vent because I sound like a whiner some times...and true. some of the problems I go through are not even notable or minor compared to others who desperately need someone to stand by them and care and Ever since I was in school or when I first entered the internet, I did all I can to those who I call my friends to be that one Ear, that one listener...the one person that they needed to hear they're cries and tell them...it's okay to cry and let it out...you can do so and not be alone. I will always continue to do that for those I care about and I have no regrets of setting aside my little problems for the issues that are plaguing others.

Like I said, I don't want to whine or vent and just be ignored because of my smaller problems because they are small and they are nothing but a small discouragement alone....but when so many little things seem to combine their forces together and latch on to you...they feel like your being restrained over time...

Lately I've felt that way about the progress in what I do, my stories and comics, my artwork and progression, my jobs and trying to get the start of my life started, my video making ability and video gaming, my music making...

just more things compiled onto more things. There are things I want to show you guys and those who like my stuff that I can't show until I've reached a certain level with the project associated with it or my skill level with it becomes better...or out of fear of originality because I don't want to look like I was copying or following the path of something already. Every story in my head, even some of my fan-based stories, some of my characters and ideas and plots...I want to show them to you all...

there's a universe in my head...a multiverse brimming with connections, worlds, theories on how things could work...and I can't seem to get them out fast enough...

At one point I was working on 5 stories at once on paper because I made time my enemy during school. Up until after I got out of school, did I realize I was only stunting my progress than moving forward. So I decided to work on one story at a time.

Moonscar, my scifi story, was the one on the platform and for 3 years I worked on page by page on paper and scanned and uploaded to my computer. Even during those 4 years I sorta reverted back to working on pages for another story simultaneously and I got further in progress on both stories. It was up until the end of 2014, that I came to a wall that halted my progress again because I got stuck for no reason and it made me angry at myself. It was then when I first drew that picture that became my ID for 2015. That picture had spawned Litith, my soon to be Mascot Character for my entire 'studio' header. At that point I wanted to challenge myself, to create and finish a story from start to finish that wasn't already pre-rendered and developed in my head. 

Rings Of Tinuris was that story and until 2016, it was the only story I focused on and tried to develop and then by the new year of 2016, I began the prologue.

It's almost the end of 2017 and I've made progress as an artist both style and project wise...

but these Small limits still are latched to my wrists...like these things or something that I've not conquered enough are holding me back from being seen...from all my creations not being...well...i don't know what the word is. All I know is...I just feel like something is holding me back...holding me down and pulling me back while I look up at that spotlight of where I want to be. I don't care to be the center of the light....just illuminated...

Anyways...I'm sorry for ranting I'll try to keep this to a miminum and I gotta head back out to my job.  I see you guys.

-Shaoz